hi general reading

[dreamgurl]

Hi im new to this site,
I have so many questions and would really like a reading. One question I do have, am I any closer to getting what I desirer and if so if possible is there any timing as to when?
thanks
dreamgurl

[eye_of_tiger]

Hi im new to this site,
I have so many questions and would really like a reading. One question I do have, am I any closer to getting what I desirer and if so if possible is there any timing as to when?
thanks
dreamgurl

Hello and welcome.

Because it is often difficult to predict the future as it is changing all the time in response to whatever you do in the present moment to help yourself, and because these readings are only thought to apply to a period of the next six months after your request was made, future timing about exactly when this desired event is most likely to happen is virtually out of the question. The exact timing given through  reading is possible, but it is highly unlikely or improbable and I would not hold my breath waiting for it.

Are you any closer to getting what you want? Or if your response to the posting about the Aquarius Man in THE HUG EXCHANGE is anything to go by, would your question instead be "am I any closer to getting HIM"?

YES of course you must be getting progressively closer to having him as your partner over time, as you go out together in public and hopefully get to know each other better. Your progress may seem painfully slow or non existent, but every small gain is a step in the desired direction. How much closer  to the desired destination are you than six months ago (if you knew each other then), would be the bigger question.

Now in order to really know what if any impact you are making upon him wanting to be with you romantically I would necessarily need to directly read the contents of his mind, and mainly what are his thoughts and intentions towards you. A reading directly about another person other than yourself is called a third party reading, and these are strictly forbidden according to our forum rules.

Please do not request readings for other people (including family members) or third party readings as this is strictly against Mystic Board’s policies.

http://mysticboard.org/vi ... hp?t=73424

With the third party reading route blocked to me, I must resort to giving you an indirect reading of him through you. Any insights coming out of such an indirect reading cannot be as reliable when compared to if the third party option had been open to me, but it is the nearest and best alternative which I can offer you in advising you if it is felt that there is any real future or realistic hope for your relationship with him surviving and growing over time.

I consulted the Tarot cards this time with the question as follows.

How much closer is this woman getting to this man wanting her romantically since when compared to when they first met, and above all what positive and practical things could she reasonably do during the next six months, to hurry up up the process?

At first glance your focus card for this reading which was the Eight of Pentacles seems totally irrelevant to my question. We are supposed to be talking here about a close human relationship here, whereas members of the Pentacles Tarot suit are normally associated with money. Either money itself, better managing and conserving what money you already have and earning more of it usually either through getting a better paid job or a promotion in your current job, or more than one job at a time.

I call this card the "money does not grow on trees card". It must instead be honestly earned through our own efforts on a regular basis. Perseverance, commitment and considerable self discipline and will power are needed to both get the money that you need, and to make that money work as effectively for you as possible.

Because this was your focus card I can only conclude that money or a notable lack of it is a significant part of the reason why you are not closer by now to getting together with him as a couple. Is it his job, your job, or both? Does one of you have a much larger amount of money available to you at any given time which could be acting like a brake on your relationship? Is either of you waiting to get money which is owed to you through a legal process?

Whatever the reason is for this money shortage or imbalance, it is apparently dragging upon the relationship developing further: big time.  Until you find a way to resolve some of these money problems and reach a mutually satisfying agreement about how your combined funds will be spent, the reading does not see your chances of making a major breakthrough on the relationship front during the next six months to be much more than 50%. So you are  little closer, but still not close enough.

Anything which you can reasonably do in the direction of resolving your money conflicts, without offending his male ego which tells him that he should be the main provider in your relationship, to promote such a mutually satisfying agreement must surely boost your chances of getting him sooner, well above the 50% level  which is expected by luck or chance alone.

Effective human communication often consists of less than 10% of the time talking, and over 90% of the time spent really listening to your partner's fears and needs. Remain sensitive to his male ego, which is looking more than a little fragile or brittle to me at the moment. Compromise must be two sided, if it is not to be seen as surrender. He must in turn be sensitive to your fears and needs. It takes two to tango?

L&L,

EoT  :smt008

[dreamgurl]

Thank you for the the reading.
I never thought that money could be an issue. It is painfully slow and I haven't really known what to do.
thank you
dreamgurl

[eye_of_tiger]

Dear Dreamgurl,  

It was my pleasure and privilege.

It is felt that conflicts of opinion about money could be an issue here, but that it is also only an outward symptom of an underlying lack of self confidence and unwillingness on his part to commit to a long term partnership, when he is really not sure what to expect from it.

There is a strong feeling that he is worried that history could repeat itself, as this unwillingness to commit is nothing personal against you.

In other words he has it is suggested been hurt before in a previous relationship, and he is now dragging behind him some of the negative emotional baggage which was the result of him committing too early, into your current relationship.

Concerns about money by him are only one outward manifestation of this negative emotional baggage. It will also reveal itself in other ways to you which have absolutely nothing at all to do with money .

To a certain extent his behaviour towards you is both unconscious and learned. If you asked him why he is like this he may honestly tell you that he really does not know why he is feeling so confused, when the decision as to whether or not to go ahead and make the commitment should be a no brainer (a decision that makes itself).

I genuinely wish you both all the best things in life, although I am not wanting to insult your intelligence by telling you that convincing him that you are meant to be together in spite of his doubts, is going to be an easy task.

Love never guarantees that our lives will always be smooth sailing?

L&L,

EoT  

[dreamgurl]

Thanks again
I've always known that its him that's stopping us being together an convincing him  that we should be together is not an easy task. Somedays he's really friendly and other days he won't speak to me.  i feel that there is nothing esle i can do except go an tell him how i feel, but i dont want to make things worst or freak him out. I wonder if telling him that everythingwill be okay, would be the best way to go about it.

[eye_of_tiger]

i feel that there is nothing else i can do except go an tell him how i feel, but i don't want to make things worst or freak him out. I wonder if telling him that everything will be okay, would be the best way to go about it.

NO PLEASE DO NOT tell him everything which you are feeling all at once, as this is almost guaranteed to make him freak out, and as a result make him permanently close down all channels of communication with you from then on.

I think that the best approach would be to get him more on your side by NOT pushing your theory that it is him alone who is stopping you from being together (and that it has always been his fault).

This is making it sound to him as though you think that you are  perfect and have never made mistakes, and that you are blaming him entirely for your relationship problems, as if he is consciously and deliberately doing this in order to hurt you.

This is not a particularly good way of getting him to be open to the reality that your feelings about this misunderstanding between you are probably just as confused as his own.

Once he begins to feel that you are no longer entirely criticizing and accusing him for everything which has happened and that you still want to be with him to work upon your problems together as equally responsible without always playing the blame game, describe one of your feelings to him at a time, then ask him whether he feels the same or differently. And listen to his answers without interfering or telling him that he should not be feeling that way.

Allow him to own and recognise his right to have his feelings. As he must in return if this is going to work allow you to own your feelings and not have him constantly interfering and telling you that you should not be feeling like that.

By his responses you should then be able to gauge if it is the right time to talk about your next feeling, and so on as you progressively work through your list of strongest feelings one feeling at a time. Use his response to your admission of feeling that way to guide you as to how slowly or quickly you can safely reveal your other feelings to him, without unintentionally pushing his freak out button in the process by dumping too much upon him at one time.

Does this help?

Peace to the both of you,

EoT

[dreamgurl]

Yes it does, its like your confirming what I have known, but ive never been entirely sure how to handle it. Ive never put the blame on him, ive always admitted that I have had my own issues to deal with to and I can say that I am dealing with them, I know how to handel them.
You have been a big help thank you so much

[eye_of_tiger]

Ive never put the blame on him

Whether or not you blame him for any of this, if he sees you as blaming him even when you are not, the damaging effects to all future communication between you will still be exactly the same.

ive always admitted that I have had my own issues to deal with

His unconscious mind may be conveniently ignoring that you have already admitted this on several occasions, and is instead exclusively focused upon beating up on himself for not feeling as though he is good enough for you.

Somedays he's really friendly and other days he won't speak to me.

He may feel that you deserve better than what he has to offer you, and so repeatedly allows you to get closer to him then almost immediately after that pushes you away, presumably because he has genuine feelings for you but at the same time wants to set you free to find someone else whom he feels would be able to give you more than he ever could.  

I realize that the above explanation probably sounds highly illogical to you, even for someone like him who has fallen in love.

The following statement came through me instead of from me, as I cannot consciously remember writing it.

Understood?

Who ever said that the human heart must always act logically in all situations has obviously had little first hand practical experience of the torpedo effect upon our abilities to think clearly and rationally, which often results from the flooding effects of our body's "love chemicals".

These will be my final comments about this subject until next time. The reading is now signed, sealed and delivered to you in full, to the very best of my abilities. Please do not feel that you need to respond to these comments here, as they have only been provided with the intention to support your ongoing efforts to make him see that by hurting himself he is hurting the very person whom he is wanting to protect from having her feelings hurt any more.

Now that IS really illogical!  :smt017

L&L,

EoT  

[dreamgurl]

Thank you EoT
Im speechless,  so all I can say is thank you very much