How easy do you find it to accept things?

Post by **swetha** » Sat Aug 08, 2009 9:40 am

I do try hard... and I have improved... but I still find it difficult to accept somethings..maybe because I dont agree to it or cannot accept people for being the way they are....

How easy is it for u?

cherokeelady · Post by **cherokeelady** » Sat Aug 08, 2009 12:08 pm

If you look at people and things that happen in your life as part of the natural cycle of life then it is a lot easier to accept them.  If things seem difficult then look for answers inside yourself.  Meditate on the problem for a while and the answer will come.  All people have different ways about them.  Try to look at the good in people and their flaw don't seem that great.

spiritalk · Post by **spiritalk** » Sat Aug 08, 2009 2:40 pm

One of the hardest lessons of life is the one where we learn to release.  Releasing our connection to negative experiences helps us learn to allow the lesson without the pains.  Accepting the value of a lesson, without the pains it causes, is a measure of our ability to release all into God's hands.  

Some call this a Karmic response generated by the negativity of another person.  Some say: let go and let God.  All in all it is a measure of our ability to release (body (emotions too), mind, spirit) so that we can move on to the next lesson of life.

sweet doll · Post by **sweet doll** » Wed Dec 08, 2010 5:55 am

it is also difficult to accept many things in life but we had to.i do not like to be untidy and donot like people those who are untidy.around me there are many people who are untidy i just close my eyes and do according to my preference.

Post by **swetha** » Wed Dec 08, 2010 7:30 am

Its becoming easier for me to accept things... 10 years ago I would be all upset and angry... not any more

I dont know how this change has come about.. all I know is it did not happen overnight but I am glad I am strong enough to accept issues and move on.

Krishnakumar M R · Post by **Krishnakumar M R** » Wed Dec 08, 2010 6:12 pm

It is a good topic to discuss and participate...

Yes... It is very difficult to accept few things in our life.

For example : We have done a mistake, we know that it is a mistake... But we will not accept that as a mistake in front of others because of our ego.

First of all, in order to grow, we must accept our mistake once we know that, we have done mistake but before somebody points out it.  In fact, it dilute most of the problem... We should leave our ego of asking sorry or accept our mistake.

Most of the persons opinion is - A person who accepts his mistake and asking sorry for the mistake is a great person and grow or climb up in the ladder of life.

Thanks

Krishna

ConfusedMind · Post by **ConfusedMind** » Thu Dec 09, 2010 2:19 pm

a teenager, i wondered, do we need to accept unwanted things? time taught, we have to even if we don't want to. we say, we grow stronger when we are able to accept things. what cannot be cured must be endured. and, we philosophize endurance as strength.  the truth is that there is no way other than accepting things. i guess, detachment is the trick.  more the involvement, tougher it is not to react. the more detached we are, the more we can accept.

Rhutobello · Post by **Rhutobello** » Thu Dec 09, 2010 2:50 pm

ConfusedMind wrote: the more detached we are, the more we can accept.

Yes.....but to what Value?

In fact it is a downgrading of yourself to detach thing (persons, causes,whatever) in order to protect yourself.

Most big Crimes....wars...in the world has happen because people detach themselves from reality....they don't want to take a stand...they are afraid of own security ....they believe they don't play any role....we all do.

We must try to have a full worthy life, and that include attaching oneself to the surroundings.
Only then can you acheive happiness by share your life with other people.
Only then can you archive pride in something you have done.

Of course we will experience unwanted thing....but pain has to be experienced, in order for again fully understand happiness.

How can we learn if we don't do mistakes?

We are not "the ONE", and since we are not "the One" we must learn to accept mistakes....we must learn that we must adjust.....we must learn that progress in friendship, and relationship build on mutual understanding, and mutual will to adjust to each other...and the society.

Life is a Long process of Learning, and that makes it exciting.

If we should do no mistakes...then we would have to know it all on beforehand....and life would have been a dull experience.....you would never see a peak in your development.....you would never feel success...Because you have never Known the opposite feeling

ConfusedMind · Post by **ConfusedMind** » Thu Dec 09, 2010 3:43 pm

Rhutobello wrote: Most big Crimes....wars...in the world has happen because people detach themselves from reality....they don't want to take a stand...they are afraid of own security ....they believe they don't play any role...

detachment can result in inactivity and can make one unreactive. it cannot make one commit crime or wage war. how can one get involved in a war if they do not have stand? what do they fight for? they may remain inexperienced. they may remain underdeveloped or undeveloped. but they cannot be criminals or wage wars.

Rhutobello wrote: How can we learn if we don't do mistakes?

true we learn through mistakes. they help us remember what went wrong.but, it is not always necessary to make mistakes to learn. and, making mistakes does not always teach lessons.

Rhutobello wrote: We are not "the ONE", and since we are not "the One" we must learn to accept mistakes....we must learn that we must adjust.....we must learn that progress in friendship, and relationship build on mutual understanding, and mutual will to adjust to each other...and the society.

yes we are not the one. the most positive attitude may be to think we are just another someone. my point is, what's the problem if i think i'm none? it does not harm anyone.

i am negative in my ways of thinking, so i think i'm none and would like to stay away. that is how i find solutions, even if it makes me inexperienced and underdeveloped. this may be because of the abnormal life i lead. but, how many are there, who do not think we are 'the ONE'?

Grandpa, you are ripe in experience. how many of such people have you seen? how many relationships have you seen, with 'mutual understanding' and 'adjustment', and not 'compromise'?

spiritalk · Post by **spiritalk** » Thu Dec 09, 2010 4:16 pm

I am truly smarting from a situation.  I think the tears are more confusion and annoyance than they are pain.  But all and all someone certainly let me down.  

I will accept my responsibility in all things.  But there are definitely things that happen over which we can not nor should not control other people and their reactions.  And when this happens no amount of detachment will cause the tears to dry or the frustration to cease.  Perhaps it is just the journey through the relationship that is the key to our own understanding and acceptance.

Relationships are fraught with all kinds of expectations, let downs, upliftment and any spectrum of feelings.  Each step is important to arrive at the true and deep friendship that often turns to love.

Rhutobello · Post by **Rhutobello** » Thu Dec 09, 2010 7:25 pm

ConfusedMind wrote:
Rhutobello wrote: Most big Crimes....wars...in the world has happen because people detach themselves from reality....they don't want to take a stand...they are afraid of own security ....they believe they don't play any role...
detachment can result in inactivity and can make one unreactive. it cannot make one commit crime or wage war. how can one get involved in a war if they do not have stand? what do they fight for? they may remain inexperienced. they may remain underdeveloped or undeveloped. but they cannot be criminals or wage wars.

Rhutobello wrote: How can we learn if we don't do mistakes?
true we learn through mistakes. they help us remember what went wrong.but, it is not always necessary to make mistakes to learn. and, making mistakes does not always teach lessons.

Rhutobello wrote: We are not "the ONE", and since we are not "the One" we must learn to accept mistakes....we must learn that we must adjust.....we must learn that progress in friendship, and relationship build on mutual understanding, and mutual will to adjust to each other...and the society.
yes we are not the one. the most positive attitude may be to think we are just another someone. my point is, what's the problem if i think i'm none? it does not harm anyone.

i am negative in my ways of thinking, so i think i'm none and would like to stay away. that is how i find solutions, even if it makes me inexperienced and underdeveloped. this may be because of the abnormal life i lead. but, how many are there, who do not think we are 'the ONE'?

Grandpa, you are ripe in experience. how many of such people have you seen? how many relationships have you seen, with 'mutual understanding' and 'adjustment', and not 'compromise'?

When one discuss in an international fora...then one must try to think what is said....and not only read...

If a society is aware, and fight for what they think are their humans right, then they are attached...they fight crime...they fight  injustice....this will then decrease...we prevent it!

If we detach ourselves...then we as a part of our society lower its awareness....which open up for more crime....and more injustice. (one of the reason for misinformation, secrecy, book firers, keeping back information....governments way to make detaching of problems)

If we make an mistake....and do the same mistake again...then maybe we did not learn enough the first time.....but after some tries the lesson should stay.

Yes, we might learn thing even if we don't make mistakes.....but there is no need then to say we can learn everything without mistakes.

If you are indifferent, you personally might not hurt someone.....but because you are indifferent you might hurt someone indirect because you don't take a stand, and fight for what you believe in.

I am sure if you experienced unfairness, and found yourself alone, you should wish that someone would care enough to do something....at least give you some comfort!

A Relationship that build on other thing then the eastern Tradition, or arranged marriage, experience almost 50% divorces.
They don't divorce in order to divorce...they divorce because there is no mutual understanding and will to see it through......in every relationship...that be between people or firms...there need to be mutual understanding and will to compromise....if not it is a dictatorship....and then there is one ruler and one who suffer!
The more "the Indian" people become educated, and economic "free" , the more you will see it also there....

ConfusedMind · Post by **ConfusedMind** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 5:17 am

my reactions may be instant. but, replying without giving it a thought is stupidity, i know. just that my ways of thinking did not match with those of yours, Grandpa.

committing crime or battling wars do need involvement on part of the participants. society is aware and attached. so it fights crime. criminals have their own stand, they they are something/someone to fight against. i guess, you hint at their ignorance and intellectual or perceptional confinement. but, there's a difference between confinement to a smaller world and staying detached despite having the knowledge. America has a feeling of attachment to its people. so it could not ignore attacks on the WTC. thus came war against terrorism. Laden has his attachment to his feeling for his community with his own ideas in his own ways. so he commits crime. had they been detached, no war would have resulted.

so far as the learning through mistakes part is concerned, we are almost of the same thoughts - just that the attitudes vary. i would like to think the glass is half empty while you would like to think the glass is half filled.

nobody should be hurt at my not taking a stand. if you give it a thought, you can perhaps understand that not taking a stand is, at times, a pretty definite stand.

it is not that i've not had unfair experiences. but i really do not expect anyone to care or give comfort. i do not expect the impossible.

true that a relationship that build on other thing then the eastern Tradition, or arranged marriage, experience almost 50% divorces. doesn't it reflect the temporariness of mutual understanding or adjustment?

And, there's no reason to think Indian people are not educated and economically free enough. they are. exceptions exist in every country. so does in India. and even India does not a less divorce ratio.

in fact, here i have nothing to disagree with. you are saying what it should be, while i am talking about what it is. the conflict is eternal,

misty sur · Post by **misty sur** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 5:34 am

swetha wrote:I do try hard... and I have improved... but I still find it difficult to accept somethings..maybe because I dont agree to it or cannot accept people for being the way they are....

How easy is it for u?

i totally agree. the situation is quite the same with me. sometimes, i just cannot accept things the way are because it irritates me. my husband helps me lot in this area. i have improved. i have become a little more considerate these days. but i still have a long way to go.

govardhanvt · Post by **govardhanvt** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 7:37 am

swetha wrote:I do try hard... and I have improved... but I still find it difficult to accept somethings..maybe because I dont agree to it or cannot accept people for being the way they are....

How easy is it for u?

If one aspire for nothing , it is very much easy to accept things, as there is nothing to be accepted. It is not very difficult to aspire for nothing and you will be able to see nothing to accept. When everything is nothing and nothing is everything, there is no question of accepting anything, and thus the above question becomes redundant as there would be nothing to accept

ConfusedMind · Post by **ConfusedMind** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 7:54 am

i like that. i like that..

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