While I'm at it...

Doe · Post by **Doe** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 12:35 am

Hi, Molissa,

Believe it or not, I actually have been away from my computer today; I just sat down after dinner to "see" what's going on!

As a matter of fact, you're making a lot of sense.  A day or two ago, Karlene said something about "letting it happen", and I told her that David had said the same thing, in those words, a day or two earlier!  The temptation, as a human, I guess, IS to try to analyze, understand, and make sense of things in terms that we're used to.  But I have gotten a strong sense that that's not what I'm supposed to be doing, at least for the time being.  What I need to do, for the most part, is to simply watch, see what's said, see what symbols appear, and when, and just try to absorb.  On a number of occasions (it's happened in a big way several times in the past few days), I've had those "ah-hah!" moments in which something suddenly makes sense (and then I think, "Duh--how did I not realize that before?!").  And I still understand that I STILL might not really get it completely, but I think I'm making some progress.  I'm getting the impression that it's a very complicated world "out there"--much more so than it's comfortable to think.  I'll be lucky if it takes a lifetime...

Just something that I meant to add on this topic--at times, rather than just seeing a single eye within the arrow/triangle, I seem to see a whole, "living", moving face.  Let it happen...

Thanks!

Doe

Doe · Post by **Doe** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 12:43 am

You know, on re-reading my last post I can't help but think how this all can start to sound so heavy and esoteric and devoid of any kind of concrete meaning. That's fine--I know that there's a point in all of it, and that I'm learning, but my favorite moments are actually those in which David is "my David" from (oh my God) almost 19 years ago--he'll crack a joke, or even say something slightly off-color, and make me crack up, just as he used to do. That's when I'm even happier with all of this! I don't feel the need to make it all deep, dark, and heavy all the time. If he and I lose our senses of humor (his was great, even when he was at death's door), then we're lost, I think.

Doe

Molissa · Post by **Molissa** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 12:49 am

quote: I don't feel the need to make it all deep, dark, and heavy all the time.  If he and I lose our senses of humor (his was great, even when he was at death's door), then we're lost, I think.

that's when I say BINGO!!
If I didn't have my sense of humor I wouldn't/couldn't have lived this long.
I think this whole "thing", yours, mine, ours, this "thing" we all share, these gifts, this lifetime (and all to come) are meant to have joy.  I think sometimes enjoying the experiences of our gifts are to be just that, joy.  The age old question of what is the meaning of life - I've always felt I knew that answer.  for me anyway.  It's to Live Laugh Love and Learn.
just my thoughts....
(Hi Doe)

Doe · Post by **Doe** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 1:00 am

I totally agree! And the last post I wrote just reminded me of something else (my--how I do go on!) that David said yesterday...something like, "A lot of people want to talk to spirits, but you don't lose your sense of who they were as people." I think it's a really important thing to remember--that spirits are people who were once, living, thinking, feeling people, and that they retain much of who they were after they've died. Treating them as dark, frightening, mysterious creatures must be hurtful. I hope that, once I kick the bucket, someone will remember that, and let me make a joke or two without getting totally freaked out (even if my jokes aren't all that funny  :) )!

Doe

karlenespellman · Post by **karlenespellman** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 12:21 am

Hi Doe,
Once you kick the bucket, I promise to never be freaked out and remember all of your jokes and helpfulness as long as you come and make my coffee, since D can't, being to busy with you. LOL
I try being funny.

Lots of love
Karlene

FireRose · Post by **FireRose** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 4:22 pm

Doe wrote:I totally agree! And the last post I wrote just reminded me of something else (my--how I do go on!) that David said yesterday...something like, "A lot of people want to talk to spirits, but you don't lose your sense of who they were as people." I think it's a really important thing to remember--that spirits are people who were once, living, thinking, feeling people, and that they retain much of who they were after they've died. Treating them as dark, frightening, mysterious creatures must be hurtful. I hope that, once I kick the bucket, someone will remember that, and let me make a joke or two without getting totally freaked out (even if my jokes aren't all that funny :) )!

Doe

I sincerely hope that time is far, far away... but you are always welcome in my head! I guess you'll have us fighting over your time/energy ... it's a good thing! We love you!

haha

Doe · Post by **Doe** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 4:30 pm

Well, my time-management skills were never too hot, so I'll have to work out some kind of schedule for getting into people's heads and cracking jokes!  (Thank you--that was really sweet, FireRose.)

A few days ago I was telling David that I'll be expecting a party, flowers, dinner, and a movie when I get "there".

"Give me time to get ready," he said.  I guess he's not in any hurry for me to kick the bucket either!

Doe

FireRose · Post by **FireRose** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 4:42 pm

Hahaha , Doe, that's too precious.

I think you'll be stuck here a while... and that's fine with us!

Any new thoughts on the symbol? Has D given you anymore insight? All I keep reading from it is "move straight forward without hesitation" Does that mean anything to you?

Doe · Post by **Doe** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 5:00 pm

Nope--it's still on the ever-expanding "later list"!  :smt002

There is one thing about the symbol that I didn't mention before, if only because it sounds SO crazy, and I didn't "know" you all quite as well then.  So here goes:

Last summer, I seemed to be under what might be called "spiritual attack."  Either that or there were just a lot of frightened, angry spirits talking to each other and to me and I hadn't yet learned to take David's advice about ignoring/filtering them.  It got pretty intense--a lot of insults, threats, etc.

But I'd seen that symbol around me a lot, especially at times when I felt particularly threatened, and I had a sense that it was meant to protect me in some way.  So one evening when things were really bad I got the bright idea of "drawing" the symbol around me in my head.  I could see it taking shape around me as I "drew", and I kept drawing more, and bigger ones, and they seemed to kind of take on a life of their own and form a chain around me (see why I was hesitant to tell you this?!).

Suddenly, the "voices" (again, not actually voices, but "writing" I see before me) started to say things like, "That may work for a while, but..." blah, blah, blah, and then I was called a "witch" (not the first occasion for that in my life!  :) ) a number of times.  But it did seem to work--not always completely, but things started to calm down a lot shortly afterwards (and now I don't really have those kinds of problems much any more, and when I do I know how to handle it because David's given me the "tools").

So, that's my weird story for today.  What can I possibly come up with for tomorrow?!

Doe

P.S.  I don't know if "moving forward without hesitation" is what the symbol is about, but it's certainly an apt analysis of what I need to do with a number of aspects of my life right about now.  Thanks!

FireRose · Post by **FireRose** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 5:21 pm

Oh my! I wish you said that before!! LOL

Arrows are great for fighting an enemy at a distance. It could be a symbol of keeping them at bay and from getting too close to you. The eye says I SEE YOU THERE, I KNOW YOU'RE THERE, YOU CAN'T FOOL ME and the arrow says YOU'LL NEVER GET TO ME! It's a good sign that you were given an arrow (because they weren't too close!) If you ever feel they are getting too close for comfort or the arrow loses it's effect, ask for a spear ... if they break through that, a sword and shield.

That came mostly from X ... Jeeze I think he's starting to like you. Seriously I typed it and read it over because I had no idea what I typed... but um I agree with it!

Doe · Post by **Doe** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 5:39 pm

I'm flattered! (I get the feeling I wouldn't want to be on X's bad side, anyway...)

That's SO cool, and interesting (especially as you typed it out without really "processing" what you were being told). I'm hoping that things never get like that again, but I will definitely keep the spear, sword, and shield in mind!

Thank you (both)!

Doe

Doe · Post by **Doe** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 5:46 pm

P.S.  Interesting, too, that you said something about the eye saying, "You can't fool me."  The worst thing that happens is that "they" try to either fool me into thinking they're David, and/or tell me he's leaving, he hates me, he's just my imagination, etc.  I can deal with the threats and insults, but only recently has he been able to convince me that whenever I hear that it's pure B.S., and that he's always around--even when I can't "find" him for a while--and that he's not going anywhere.  He very often says, "Safe with me," and I believe him.  Phew.

Doe

FireRose · Post by **FireRose** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 5:52 pm

Good. I'm glad that all made sense!!!

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